How To Create Abundance While Going Through Divorce
I've been doing a lot of soul-searching this year (a lot more than in past years) and there's been a theme: I need more abundance in my life. I've struggled with feeling inadequate and "less than" as long as I can remember. Lately, I've been getting tired, I snap at people easily. And when I look inward and ask my spiritual guide what is missing, the answer is "abundance". Abundance in happiness, creativity, connection. And abundance in love for myself.
I think we can all use more abundance, right? We seem to live in a world of scarcity. There isn't enough money. There aren't enough quality men. There's not enough time in the day. We don't have enough energy. We don't get enough sleep. We don't get to spend enough time with friends. It seems like there's just not enough of anything we really want and need.
The thing with scarcity is that it immediately shifts us into survival mode. We notice some deficiency in our lives, and we react by becoming desperate and our survival instincts kick in. This would be perfectly helpful if we were, in fact, in the woods depending solely on our own hands and wits to keep us alive. But most of the time we aren't in such dire circumstances. (Except maybe an hour before bedtime when the kids want to do anything but calm down and get ready for sleep.) For the most part, we lead pretty comfortable lives.
How Can We See Abundance?
I went to the lake this morning to reconnect with my spiritual guide. While I was brooding about abundance, I thought, "I know abundance exists. I get it. But I don't see it. How can I see it?" At that moment, I noticed a firm, broad tree right in front of me. The tree had obviously been there the whole time I was sitting in my car contemplating this simple, yet deep and illusive, idea of abundance, yet I hadn't really seen it before. I hadn't noticed it until I asked my spiritual guide how to see it ... until I asked her how to see abundance.
The answer was right in front of me: Abundance is everywhere. It's in the lush, green grass and the strong, towering trees. Abundance is in a child's laugh and a first kiss. Abundance is found in sharing a bowl of cereal with your family every morning. It's in realizing you deserve better than the relationship that's slowly draining your soul. Abundance is in deep breaths and the little time you sneak for yourself after you put your kids to sleep.
One definition of abundance is "overflowing fullness." Now, we have been taught that abundance is this huge deal, this obvious, in-your-face concept. I mean, you would know abundance if you saw it, right? But if you think about abundance simply as "overflowing fullness," then you will realize that you can feel that fullness and bounty in countless moments throughout the day. Abundance isn't as much quantity as it is quality.
The Abundance Of Truly Loving Yourself
When you don't love yourself, when you don't know your own worth, it's hard to see the abundance that's all around you. I promote self-love a great deal, but up until my spiritual guide helped me really see that tree that had been in front of me all along, I hadn't realized how important self-love is in helping us see and feel and understand abundance. And understanding abundance is a huge shift that moves you out of scarcity mode and into a free and open heart--a heart that's ready and willing to receive that abundance.
So, I guess the thing I need most is not abundance. There's enough of that already staring me right in the face. What I need--what we all need--is an openness and a willingness to love ourselves just as we are. When we truly love ourselves, we are able to see the unmistakable abundance all around.